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Фэн-Клуб ADGTH - Тексты -> Fan-Fictions (просмотр текста)

NOTHING NORMAL AS USUAL.
 Добавлен Charlie, 30.07.06, 21:56
NOTHING NORMAL AS USUAL.

By Ninetalesuk.


*Flea Bite Cafe*


(The cafe was busy as usual. But, things are really going topsy-turvy when Ninetalesuk walked in and tripped as he walked behind a sofa. Everyone stopped what they were doing and looked at the white fox, whom held a brick in his paw).


NINETALESUK:Who left this brick here?


(Slowbro, holding a magazine, raised his hand in the air).


SLOWBRO:I did, Ninetales.

NINETALESUK:Why?

SLOWBRO:I was looking through this magazine of 'Strange Styles' and I thought I could try this design out from this front cover.

NINETALESUK:Well, place this brick where ANYONE can see it, that way, no one will be tripping over this hard object.

SLOWBRO:Okay.


(Slowbro took the brick and walked away. Ninetalesuk sighed).


NINETALESUK:Whats next?


(Enters Growlithe and Charleon, holding a plank).


GROWLITHE:Hey, Ninetales!

NINETALESUK:Growlithe, Charleon, whats with the plank?

CHARLEON:WE are gonna do a trick!

NINETALESUK:What kind of trick?

CHARLEON:This kind of trick!


(Growlithe brought over a barrel and waited for Charleon to put the plank down. Later, Charleon was bowing as some dogs were clapping).


NINETALESUK:Amazing trick. Growlithe goes on one end of the plank which you, Charleon, will jump on the other end, sending Growlithe into the air and land on the roof of the building!

CHARLEON:Thats right!

NINETALESUK:And, how exactly is Growlithe gonna get off that building?


(Charleon's face was blank. He looked up and shouted at the top of his voice).


CHARLEON:Growlithe!!!!

GROWLITHE:Yeah?

CHARLEON:I wanna ask you something.... How are we gonna get you down from there?

GROWLTIHE:Erm..... to tell you the truth...

CHARLIE:You haven't got a clue how to get down from there?

GROWLITHE:....No......

CHARLIE:Right........ Listen, Growlithe. By the look of this huge building..... you can jump off the roof and land on something soft like Slowbro's head.

GROWLITHE:Nothin' doing! I'm not gonna jump from this roof!

CHARLIE:Fine! Stay up there.

GROWLITHE:Okay.


(Charlie sighed and turned to Ninetalesuk).


CHARLIE:How are we gonna get him down from there?

NINETALESUK:I'll go back to my house and find a book.

CHARLIE:All right....

NINETALESUK:Come on, Shaina!


*Ninetalesuk's home*


(Ninetalesuk and Shaina arrived back home as the fox Pokemon started looking through his bookcase. Shaina watched him).


SHAINA:It just like every normal day.

NINETALESUK:Yeah.... except its not normal.

SHAINA:Yep.... what book are you looking for anyway?

NINETALESUK:'How to get a Growlithe off the Roof'. We'll get that daft ol'mutt off that roof even if we have to dismantle the building, brick by brick.

SHAINA:Speaking of bricks, where do you think Slowbro put that brick?

NINETALESUK:I don't know, and I don't care. Ah, here it is.


(Ninetalesuk grabbed a book at the top shelf and took it out. On top of the book was Slowbro's brick. It fell on top of Ninetalesuk's head).


*BONG!*


NINETALESUK:Argh!!!! I found the brick!!!!


(When Shaina made sure Ninetalesuk was all right, Shaina picked up the book and read the cover).


SHAINA:Who gave you this book, Ninetales?

NINETALESUK:Angus... why?

SHAINA:Did you look at the author of the book?

NINETALESUK:Nope...

SHAINA:Well, you should. 'How to get a Growlithe off the Roof. By Angus McBarkin'.

NINETALESUK:What?!


(He took the book off Shaina and looked at the cover and groaned. He threw it away and picked up the brick).


NINETALESUK:Come on! I'll think up some idea to get puppy boy off the building. Meanwhile, I'm gonna pay a visit to Slow-idjeet!

SHAINA:Whatever you say, Ninetales.


*Flea Bite Cafe*


(On top of a building, the same size Growlithe is on, Vult and Vullen were talking).


VULT:Erm.... Vult.

VULLEN:Your Vult.

VULT:I am? Sorry. I'm a bit nervous since your my friend's sister.

VULLEN:Understandable. Understandable.

VULT:And, I have feelings for ya since I first saw ya... so....

VULLEN:Say no more. Say no more.

VULT:Good. I didn't know what else I was gonna say now.


(Vullen laughed at the blusing Vult. Meanwhile, on the ground, Ninetalesuk and Shaina walked in to find everyone laughing. They walked over to Lady and Tramp).


NINETALESUK:Whats happenin' here? What did we miss?

TRAMP:Umbreon and Flareon came into the cafe and when we told them what happened to Growlithe.. well..... Pidge....

LADY:Look over there and you'll see.


(Ninetalesuk and Shaina looked at the end of the cafe to see Jolteon, Espeon, Vaporeon and Flareon holding a giant megaphone. Umbreon was shouting through it).


UMBREON:Growlithe! This is the police! Come off that rooftop with your paws in the air!

NINETALESUK:Umbreon! THAT will never, EVER work! It will only make Growlithe roll over with laughter! You'll have to think up another plan!

FLAREON:Well, we called up a special dog that can help us.

NINETALESUK:Let me guess..... Angus McBarkin?

FLAREON:I don't like it when your sarcy, Ninetales.

NINETALESUK:Sorry. So, who is it?

FLAREON:.......Angus McBarkin.

NINETALESUK:*Sighs* Figures....


(Ninetalesuk walked over to the bar where Sasha, Dodger and Rita were. Ninetalesuk noticed a green bulb above the bar).


NINETALESUK:Sasha.... where did that bulb come from? Was it here before?

SASHA:Nah..... we just put it up here for that dog over there.


(Sasha pointed to a very grey bulldog on a red chair, he was sleeping and holding a plastic bottle in his paw).


SASHA:His name is Jake! Hes owned by a preist at the San Fransico church. He has a drink problem.

DODGER:Great(!) You mean to tell us when he wakes up, he'll be drunk and swear at us all?! This isn't an adult fic, for crying out loud!

SASHA:Whenever Jake is drunk, he is able to control his language so theres no worries.

RITA:The way that Jake guy is like, he almosts like that character from 'Father Ben'.

NINETALESUK:I think its 'Father Ted' you were meant to say.

RITA:Yeah....


(The green light started to flash. Sasha sighed).


SASHA:Here we go!


(Jake woke up in a grumpy state).


JAKE:Drink!


(He threw the plastic bottle to Ninetalesuk's head).


NINETALESUK:Oof!!! Goodness sake, he IS like that Jack character from 'Father Ted'! Ooh!


(Sasha laughed a little and brought up a small bottle with brown liquid in it).


DODGER:Is that his drink?

SASHA:Nope. This is ginger juice. Since he drank so much beer and wine, his taste buds didn't work anymore. So, to make sure I don't run out of any drink for my customers, I use ginger juice. Problem is, the ginger juice makes him even more drunk.

RITA:How can ginger juice make dogs even more drunk?

SASHA:Do you really wanna know..?

RITA:.......No.


(Sasha laughed and left the bar. As Shaina joined Ninetalesuk, Dodger and Rita, Slowbro enters).


SLOWBRO:'Ullo!

NINETALESUK:Ah! Slowbro, just the 'mon I want to see.

SLOWBRO:Whats up?


(Shaina handed Ninetalesuk the brick).


NINETALESUK:I found your brick on top of my books back at my flat!! Why did you put it there?

SLOWBRO:I thought it would make a nice look... though, that is not MY brick! Its different from the other brick.

DODGER:How can you tell the difference from two bricks?

SLOWBRO:The designs of the bricks are important as the structures of the bricks are....

DODGER:Enough, Slowbro! Its scary when you talk smart!

NINETALESUK:So.... where IS YOUR brick?

SLOWBRO:I gave it to someone.....

NINETALESUK:Right! Standby to be tripped up by a block of stone, everyone!

SLOWBRO:I also learned a cool move! Watch!


(Slowbro took the brick from Ninetalesuk and kicked up high!)


SHAINA:Erm..... what attack is that?

SLOWBRO:I dunno.... I haven't think up a name yet....

NINETALESUK:You don't even think, you twit!

SLOWBRO:Oh yeah.....


(Then, they heard a scream from Vullen).


VULLEN:Yooooooooooooooooow!!!!!

RITA:What was that?!

NINETALESUK:If I'm psychic, I would say it was my sister Vullen, getting her 6 brown tails squashed by Slowbro's brick, which he kicked into the air.


(Upon the roof, the brick that Slowbro kicked into the air landed on Vullen's tails. After the young female Vulpix yelled with pain, she quickly turned around and picked up the brick and showed it to Vult).


VULLEN:Where in the world did this stone appeared from?

VULT:The sky....

VULLEN:Ooh!


(She walked over to the side of the building and dropped the brick).


VULLEN:THERE! Got rid of the stinkin'....

VULT:Hold it! Vullen, yo-you didn't drop the brick over the side of the building, did you?

VULLEN:Yeah! Why?

VULT:What if it hits somebody on the head by accident?

VULLEN:Erm.... I haven't thought about that one though.....


*BONG*


VOICE:Och, OW!!!!

VULT:Vullen, I love you as your gonna die.

VULLEN:Gulp... uh oh....


(At the ground, Angus came in, holding his head).


CHARLIE:Angus, what happened to ya?

ANGUS:I got hit on the head by a brick!


(Ninetalesuk shook his head and looked up high where Vult and Vullen were).


NINETALESUK:Vullen!!!! Did you drop that brick?!

VULLEN:Brick, dear brother? What are you talking about?

NINETALESUK:Did you?

VULLEN:........Yeah.

ANGUS:Och!!!! Just you wait, Vullen! I'll get you for this!!! Angus McBarkin will never be beaten up by a girl! Not yet!!! Just you wait!!!


(Angus left the cafe in a dramatic exit, everyone was silent till Ninetalesuk spoke).


NINETALESUK:Right. I'm off home and I'll come back later and think of a way to get Growlithe down from that roof.


(Ninetalesuk started to leave and passed by Johnny, Charlie and Sasha's pup, and Patch, Scamp and Angel's pup. Ninetalesuk tripped over behind them. When he picked himself up, he held a brick in his paw).


NINETALESUK:Where did this brick come from?

JOHNNY:Hey! Thats mine! Give it back!


(Johnny tugged a string he held in his paw and the brick jumped out of Ninetalesuk's paw and landed on his foot).


NINETALESUK:Argh! Whats going on here? Where did you get that brick from?

JOHNNY:Slowbro.

NINETALESUK:Oh.... yeah.... So, what are you doing with that brick?

JOHNNY:Its Jake's new pet. I was taking his brick walkies.

NINETALESUK:P-Pet?!

PATCH:Yep. Its a wonderful pet. He doesn't have to groom it, feed it or clean it. All he has to do is take it for walks.


(Johnny walked over to Jake and handed him the brick).


JAKE:I love my brick.

NINETALESUK:How sweet for him(!) Lets all be happy for him(!)

JAKE:Ah, forget it! Fed up with brick!


(Jake threw it and it hit Ninetalesuk on the head. Everyone ran over to him to see if he is okay. Ninetalesuk sat beside the brick, drumming on it).


NINETALESUK:I'm beggining to see how annoying this is going to be!


(Ninetalesuk got up and handed Charlie the brick).


NINETALESUK:Put this brick on that plank there!

CHARLIE:Okay.


(Charlie placed the brick on the end of the plank where Charleon and Growlithe did their stunt and walked back to Ninetalesuk. Speaking of Growlithe, the puppy Pokemon was with Noctowl, Gligar and Butterfree).


NOCTOWL:Right. Are you ready?

GROWLITHE:No!!!! Theres no way! No way! No way I'm doing this stunt!

GLIGAR:(Whisper to Noctowl) Do something to make him co-operate for crying out loud!

NOCTOWL(Whisper to Gligar) Right, right.... (Normal voice) Erm... Growlithe... look me in the eye please...

GROWLITHE:Er..... all right.


(Growlithe started into Noctowl's eyes. Noctowl's eyes started to glow and Growlithe's eyes went blank. Growlithe stood to full attention in a zombie-like voice).


GROWLITHE:I'm ready to serve you, master.

BUTTERFREE:Brilliant, Noctowl! You use Hypnotised him!!! Hes in a deep trance while waiting for you to command him!

NOCTOWL:Correct! While hes in that trance, he can do anything I want him to do like, jump off the roof and landed on that plank over there!

GROWLITHE:Yes, master.


(Noctowl, Butterfree and Gligar were shocked as Growlithe ran to the edge of the building).


NOCTOWL, BUTTERFREE, GLIGAR:Growlithe!!! Don't do it!!!! Stop!!!!


(Too late, Growlithe jumped over the side. Gligar looked over as Butterfree tried to comfort Noctowl, who was upset with himself).


NOCTOWL:What have I done?

BUTTERFREE:Its all right! It wasn't your fault.

NOCTOWL:It was my fault!!! Growlithe's dead!!!

GLIGAR:No he isn't.

NOCTOWL:No?

GLIGAR:No. He landed on that plank and the other side shot a brick in the air!


(The brick came into view and went back down).


GLIGAR:Growlithe came out of his trance. Ninetalesuk is coming over and.......


*BONG*


NINETALESUK:Argh!!!!

GLIGAR:And, the brick hit Ninetalesuk in the head.

BUTTERFREE:Hes not gonna be too happy, is he?

NOCTOWL:.......No.


(Back on the ground, Charlie handed Itchy the brick).


CHARLIE:Go and give this to Sannabelle, SHE will know what to do!

ITCHY:Right, Charlie.

CHARLIE:I'll go and check on Ninetales.

ITCHY:All right, Charlie. Good luck. A angry Ninetales is NOT a good sign!

CHARLIE:Right!


*Flea Bite Cafe. TIMELINE:4 hours later*


(Vullen walked around the cafe, she stopped every few seconds in case she was being followed and continued walking around. She was being followed as Angus hid amongst some objects, following her and watching her every move. Balto and Jenna were watching them).


BALTO:They should lock Angus up for good!

JENNA:Nothing can keep that mad dog! What can stop him?

BALTO:Magikarp?


(Ninetalesuk entered with Shaina, Dodger and Rita).


DODGER:So, Ninetales. What do you find annoying in this world?

NINETALESUK:That stinking brick!

DODGER:Apart from the brick.

NINETALESUK:Well, when I was young, the most annoying person was my sister, Vullen.


(They laughed at this little joke when they stopped in front of a tree, inside was Angus).


ANGUS:Don't you worry about Vullen, I'll get her!


(Angus walked off in the tree. They were silent for a while till Rita called over to Angus, whom was out of the tree. What is he like?)


RITA:Angus. If ya like a scottish warrior, do you know any tatics at all?

ANGUS:Och aye, lass. Code. I will never reveal the name. Vultlen. Thats code... shh... shh.... And, you'll never let that victim know when you attack her.. Heh heh heh....


(Then, Angus shouted to Vullen).


ANGUS:I'm going to get you!!!! Tomorrow at 3:00 in the morning, I'm going to get you!!!!


(Charlie walked over to Angus with Shane and Itchy beside him).


CHARLIE:McBarkin!

ANGUS:Och, sir?

CHARLIE:You are a disgrace to the Barkin family! Drop and give me 20!

ANGUS:Fine.


(Angus dropped to the floor and held a $20 note to Charlie).


ANGUS:And, you better pay me back.


(Jenna was laughing her head off as Balto shook his head).


BALTO:I'm telling you, cells with those soft walls are safe for all of us.

JENNA:Yeah! Hahahahaha!!!!


(Charlie and Shane walked over to Ninetalesuk, Dodger, Shaina and Rita).


SHANE:Anything happened?

NINETALESUK:Angus going mad, what else is new?

SHANE:Good point!

SHAINA:Now I understand the title of this story. Nothing is normal in our world!

SHANE:Yeah. What else is new?


(They looked at Vullen, whom was looking at the calander beside the fish tank. When Vullen left, they saw Angus in the fish tank wearing a scuba-diving equipment. When everyone saw Angus, they were all silent till Charlie spoke to Ninetalesuk).


CHARLIE:Under any surcanstances, don't let Shaina anywhere near HIM! (Points to Angus).


(Ninetalesuk nodded. Then, Jake came over to Ninetalesuk with a megaphone and pointed it behind Ninetalesuk, he looked very angry).


JAKE:Drink!


(Ninetalesuk fell down in shock as everyone laughed... The scene slowly fades away.....)


*Golden Gate Park*


(Ninetalesuk and Shaina were at the park, sitting together at night, looking at the stars).


NINETALESUK:Ah, a beautiful night.

SHAINA:Yeah, and a wonderful day. You tripping over and getting hit on the head by a brick, Growlithe got on top of the roof and got down, Angus was following your sister as a craze loony and you been pestered by Jake who keeps on saying, 'Drink! Drink!'

NINETALESUK:How long is he and his master gonna stay in San Fransico?

SHAINA:Till the day they die. Which will be a long time since his owner is 23 years old.

NINETALESUK:Yaaaaaaa!

SHAINA:But, do not panic, Ninetales. Enjoy this night with me.

NINETALESUK:Okay.


(Ninetalesuk and Shaina looked into the sky till Ninetalesuk finally asked Shaina something...)


NINETALESUK:What Charlie did with that brick anyway?

SHAINA:He gave to Itchy, whom took it to Sannabelle. And, what Shane told me after he rang Sanna, she rocketed the brick into the sky which is going around the world. Last seen over Dundee.

NINETALESUK:Good.


(Then, something caught Ninetalesuk's eye. It was a small comet across the sky).


NINETALESUK:Wow! Thats so cool!

SHAINA:Yeah, it is....


(They looked at each other and kissed passionly.... they broke the kiss when they heard a small noise getting louder and louder. Ninetalesuk looked up and groanded).


NINETALESUK:Oh no....


*BONK*


(The comet was the brick! Ninetalesuk got up and sighed).


NINETALESUK:At least we got something comical at the end. Good night!


(He fell to the floor while Shaina sighed and looked at the brick).


SHAINA:I hope your happy.

BRICK:Yes I am....

SHAINA:Ahhhhh!!!!!


THE END.

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