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Фэн-Клуб ADGTH - Тексты -> Fan-Fictions (просмотр текста)

I SPY A SPY.
 Добавлен Charlie, 30.07.06, 21:55
I SPY A SPY.

By Ninetalesuk.


*Ninetalesuk's home*


(Sun rays came through the curtains of Ninetalesuk's new home. The white fox slowly got out of bed and yawned).


NINETALESUK:Oh boy... its another beautiful day.. what can get any worse than this?


(Then, lighting flashed and rain started to pour. Ninetalesuk sighed).


NINETALESUK:What perfect timing(!)


(When Ninetalesuk got out of his bedroom, there was a knock on the door. He opened it to let in Shaina and Eevee in, both of them were soaking wet).


NINETALESUK:Shaina? Eevee? Whats going on? What time is it?

SHAINA:Its 10 o'clock in the morning, Ninetales. Why?

NINETALESUK:Well, if its ten in the morning, why your up so early?

SHAINA:I wanted to tell you there are tickets for a concert. Wanna go?

NINETALESUK:Whats the band called?

EEVEE:Wet, Wet, Wet.

NINETALESUK:Funny. I suppose they have been out early and got wet!

EEVEE:Very funny(!)

SHAINA:So, how do ya like your new home, Ninetales?

NINETALESUK:Well... since my old home in the park collapsed, I might say its good. I won't have to sleep on the floor again!

SHAINA:Yeah, thats right!

EEVEE:And, your sister, Vullen, is now living in a flat as well, sleepin' with Vult! But, where is your parents?

NINETALESUK:They too are sleeping in a house, Eevee.

EEVEE:Ahh....

NINETALESUK:So far... nothing is seem to go wrong.


(Then, the phone rings. Ninetalesuk answered it).


NINETALESUK:Hello, the Gosport Public Baths. No running, shouting or splashing in the shallow end. Hello, Charlie. You can stop laughing now... Sorry? What happened to Angus? Okay... well, I wish him luck to be all right. Goodbye.

EEVEE:What happened to Angus?

NINETALESUK:Sanna and Ashley have suddenly gone loony! They are throwing bananas! One of them was a peeled banana skin and Angus slipped on it and broke his leg!

SHAINA:Ow....

NINETALESUK:Yeah... We better go over there and see Angus. He maybe a nutcase, but we still need to see if hes okay.

EEVEE:Right!

SHAINA:Lets go!


(Then, the phone rings again. Again, Ninetalesuk answered).


NINETALESUK:Hello. Portsmouth Plumbing-Repair Company. Hello, Rob Darling. Yes, I'll come.

SHAINA:Butch Darling... isn;t he that Labrador thats now Sir Antony Ol'Bulldog's secuarty?

NINETALESUK:Yep! It seems that Antony wants to see me! Its very important!

EEVEE:Shall we come?

NINETALESUK:Nah... I'll be back.. Make yourselfs at home.

EEVEE:'kay.


*San Fransico Hospital*


(Charlie, Sasha and Ashley were beside Angus' bedside. The scottish German Shepherd had his left leg in a cast. Ashley looked upset).


ASHLEY:Angus, I'm sorry.

ANGUS:Och, don't worry, lassie. I'm all right. I've been like this before. I faced a powerful Metapod! Do you know how many times?

CHARLIE:8...

ANGUS:8 times I faced that Metapod! Its was strong! Powerful! Indestructa...

CHARLIE:Angus! Shut up or you'll get TWO broken legs! I heard this story before! 100 times!

ANGUS:Really? Och.

SASHA:Look! Accidents DO happen. This proves why you NEVER EVER give Ashley and Sannabelle a banana because if you do...., THIS happens!

ASHLEY:Sorry...


(Then, Sannabelle enters, wearing a nurse outfit).


SANNABELLE:Hi!

SASHA:Sanna? What are you doing?

SANNABELLE:I have a part-time job in the hospital. If I'm lucky, I'll try and find those stinkin' bones in those bananas!

ASHLEY:Erm... Sanna... Bananas don't have bones.

SANNABELLE:They don't?! Then, what have I been eating?!


(Charlie shook his head and took Sasha's paw).


CHARLIE:Come on! Lets head back to the cafe!

SANNABELLE:Na.. ya can't! You have to report to Antony's office at once!

CHARLIE:Oh brilliant! Yet another mad idea of this mad man. Sasha, Ashley, you two head back to the cafe. I'll meet you over there.

SASHA:All right, Charlie!

ASHLEY:'kay, bro.


(Charlie got up and headed to the door. He stopped as an old sheepdog was limping through the door. Charlie helped him to his bed).


CHARLIE:Hello.. Are you okay? What is your name?

SMITH (Very thick German accent) My name iz Mr Smith.

CHARLIE:Listen, I'm sorry you've been landed in this bad position. Its bad enough without sharing a ward with my banana-brain cousin!

SMITH:Oh, danke schon. Ich bin ganz comfortable, old fruit.


(Charlie looked at him strangly and exited).


*Sir Antony's House*


(Charlie knocks on the door with Ninetalesuk beside him).


ANTONY:Enter!


(Charlie and Ninetalesuk entered to find Antony and a labrador named Rob Darling standing behind the desk. Since Rob took Nidorino's place, Nidorino is now hanging out at the Flea Bite Cafe. Oh yeah.... Antony is now wearing a false moustache..... Charlie and Ninetalesuk walked over to the desk).


CHARLIE:Antony! Darling! What is it you want?

DARLING:Bad news, Barkin! Theres trouble!

NINETALESUK:Why? Is something the matter?

ANTONY:You're right theres something the matter! Something sinister and grotesque! And what's worse is that it's right here under my very nose!

NINETALESUK:Come now, Antony, your moustache is lovely.

DARLING:What Antony means, Fox, is there is a leak.

CHARLIE:A leak?

DARLING:Yes! Are you familiar with Belladonna's Devil Spy?

NINETALESUK:Of course we are. Belladonna has chosen some devil dogs to spy on Annabelle! All those spy mutts have 'Von' before their names.. Why?

DARLING:It seems theres a Devil Spy. Belladonna seem to be able to anticipate our every move! We sended up an aeroplane, theres a Devil squadron parked behind the nearest cloud. We move the angels to Southampton of England, the Devils have brought the entire town supply of 'Sonic Adventure 2' games for the Dreamcast. In short, a Devil spy is giving every detail of our battle plans! And, we are worried.

ANTONY:You two looked surprise.

CHARLIE:We do, Antony. I didn't realize we had any battle plans.

ANTONY:Of course we have plans-how else do you think our battles directed!

CHARLIE:Our battles are directed, Antony?

ANTONY:Of course they are, Charlie. Directed according to my grand plan!

NINETALESUK:Would that be the plan to slaughter everyone except Annabelle, Sannabelle and their Mewtwo, Mew?

ANTONY:(Jumping up in alarm) My GOD! Even YOU know it! Guards, guards! Bolt the doors! Hammer large bits of planks on the windows! This security leak is far worse than I ever thought it could be!

DARLING:You see, Barkin, Fox, Annabelle is most anxious to destroy all Devil spies.

ANTONY:Evil mutts, fighting their dark and devilish mistress.

DARLING:But, luckily, one of our spies...

ANTONY:Splendid fellows, brave heroes risking life for their country and heavens!

DARLING.....has discovered that the leak is coming from the San Fransico Hospital.

CHARLIE:You think theres a Devil spy in the SFH? I think you are right.

ANTONY:Good job, Charlie! Ninetales! I chosen you two to do this job! All you have to do is root this spy out! How long do you think you'll need to find him?

NINETALESUK:Erm....

ANTONY:You'll have to be away from my house full of meetings for sometime.

NINETALESUK:Six months.

DARLING:Too bad, Fox. You got three weeks!

ANTONY:Yes! Three weeks to smoke that spy out! Use any method to see if and bring the spy to his hairy knees! Torture him! And, I have the best recommendation I can give you!

CHARLIE:Whats that?

ANTONY:Well. Grab hold of a Houndour, tie your suspect on a chair with a potty on his head. Get a Beedrill and put the suspect's head between the Beedrill's poisonous forearms and shout, 'Dinner time, Fido!' If you're successful, I'll want you back here pronto to head up my new security network-Operation Winkle!

NINETALESUK:Winkle?

ANTONY:Yes.. to winkle out the spies!

DARLING:Never heard that before!

ANTONY:Well, we do have some secrets, Darling. I wish you luck! Good luck!

CHARLIE:Right!


(Charlie and Ninetalesuk exited the room. Outside, they talked).


NINETALESUK:Listen, Charlie! I'll head back to my flat! I'm gonna pick up Shaina and Eevee and head on over to the park to pick up a Beedrill and try and get him to help us to find the Devil spy!

CHARLIE:Yeah! I'll go the cafe and get some friends to come with me to the hospital.

NINETALESUK:Good! Lets go!!!


(Back with Antony and Rob, the labrador was pacing).


DARLING:Drat it all, sir! Their insolence makes my blood boil! And what's more, I don't even trust them! I think I should be going to the hospital to keep an eye on them.

ANTONY:What? Spy on our own spy as they searches for their spy? Yes-why not? Sounds fun!

You'll need to be under cover.

DARLING:Yes, I know.

ANTONY:And, you need a wound. Convincing wound.

DARLING:Yes. I do.

ANTONY:Yea...


(Antony took his gun out and shot Rob's foot. Rob screamed and fell to the floor).


ANTONY:Yes.. THAT looks convincing.


*Ninetalesuk's home*


(Shaina and Eevee were watching the TV when Ninetalesuk came in with a Beedrill).


SHAINA:Ninetales, what the...?

NINETALESUK:Shaina, Eevee, meet Beedrill. Beedrill, meet Shaina and Eevee. You two, come on! We have to head to the hospital! I'll explain while we are on our way!

EEVEE:Okay!


*Flea Bite Cafe*


(Charlie came into the cafe. The place was packed. Slowbro was near the door. Everyone was quiet when Charlie came in).


CHARLIE:Pack me a toothbrush, Slowbro. We're going on holiday.

SLOWBRO:Hooray! Where to?

CHARLIE:Hospital.

SLOWBRO:Aw.. I hate hostipals! When my grandpa went in, he was stupid.

CHARLIE:He was also stupid when he went in, Slowbro. You Slowpokes and Slowbros have very, very tiny brains.

SCAMP:And, its hosPITal! Not hosTIPal!

CHARLIE:Somehow, one of Belladonna's Devil spys are in the hospital! I need some of you guys to help me!

SASHA:I'm coming, Charlie. Gerta, Bess, Shane, Ruby, can you guys take over?

SHANE:Yeah!

BESS:Go on ahead, you guys!

RUBY:Find the spy!

GERTA:Do ya wanna borrow my baseball bat?


(Outside the Flea Bite Cafe, the group that joined Charlie were with Charlie).


CHARLIE:So... lets see. Sasha, Slowbro, Scamp, Angel, Itchy, Danielle and Ace! Thats all?

ACE:Yep! Lets get that spy!

CHARLIE:Right! I'll give you some positions! We'll meet up with Ninetales, Shaina and Eevee. According to Ninetales, he'll have a Beedrill. Part of a torture to find the spy! Now, lets go everyone!


*San Fransico Hospital*


(Charlie and his group entered the room. Charlie looked at the clipboard).


CHARLIE:Right! Heres the plan! Angle, Danielle, you two will pretend to be nurses. Find Sanna so she can give you nurse outfits. Scamp, Ace, Itchy, you guys go and look around the hospital!

Sasha, Slowbro, you with me for a while! Got it?

SCAMP:Got it!


(Then, Ninetalesuk came in with Shaina, Eevee and Beedrill).


NINETALESUK:Sorry we are late! Beedrill here wanted some hunny.

ITCHY:Watch out for Winnie the Pooh then!

CHARLIE:Get a move on!


(The group left. Charlie, Ninetalesuk, Sasha, Shaina, Slowbro and Beedrill walked over to Angus' bed. Eevee went with Scamp and the others).


ANGUS:Och, whats going on?

CHARLIE:Theres a Devil spy in the hospital and its our job to find them!

ANGUS:A Devil spy... wow! Exciting stuff, eh? Wait a minute, I got an idea already!

BEEDRILL:Whats that?

ANGUS:Well, look through the list of patients and see if there's anyone here whose names begins with 'von'! Theres almost bound to be a guy!

BEEDRILL:I think that the Devil spy is using a false name.

ANGUS:Drats!

SLOWBRO:I too have a cunning plan, Charlie.

CHARLIE:Do ya, Slowbro?

SLOWBRO:We got around the hostipal and we ask them, 'Are you a Devil spy?'

NINETALESUK:I say, good work(!) But, I do have to say that I appreciate your involvement on the creative side.

SLOWBRO:If it was me, I'd own up.

NINETALESUK:Yes, of course you would. But, too bad! Belladonna didn't put down the Devil spy forms for requirements 'must have intellectual capacity of a Slowbro'


(Ninetalesuk placed his paw on Slowbro's shoulder and pointed at Smith, who was watching them through a couple of binoculars).


NINETALESUK:Slowbro, see that guy over there?

SLOWBRO:Yes?

NINETALESUK:I want you to stick to him like a limpet and make sure he does NOT leave this hospital, understand?


(Slowbro nodded and walked over. Ace's head popped out of the door).


ACE:Watch out! Smarty pants is comin'!


(Ace disappeared and Rob Darling entered, limping).


NINETALESUK:Hullo, Darling. Whats the matter with you?

DARLING:Bullet in the foot!

SHAINA:Thats interesting. I have learned that in World War 1, most men shot their foot to get out of the trenches. Why did you shot you foot?

DARLING:I didn't shoot myself, Antony did it.

NINETALESUK:Finally got fed up with you then?

DARLING:Nah... it was a mistake.

CHARLIE:Aiming for your head, was he?

DARLING:He was not aiming for anything at all!

NINETALESUK:Oh.. so he was aiming between your legs then!


(Sasha and Shaina sniggered at this).


DARLING:Ha ha(!) Very funny, Fox! I'll have the last laugh when you don't find this spy! NINETALESUK:Oh, do not worry, Darling. I'll do the interviewing right about...... NOW!


*Surgery Room. TIMELINE:3 seconds later*


(Rob was tied to a home-made torture chair with a potty on his head. Beedrill, Sasha and Shaina were laughing while Charlie was standing beside a desk where Ninetalesuk was sitting at).


DARLING:This is completely ridiculous, Fox! You can't suspect ME! I only just arrived!

NINETALESUK:The first rule of suspects is to suspect EVERYONE! Even it has to be my girlfriend, friends or family, belive me, Darling. I'll ask MYSELF some pretty searching questions!

Now, what is Nack the Weasle's favourite colour?

DARLING:Ho-How should I know?

NINETALESUK:(Raise an eyebrow) I see.... Okay, what is Sonic's enemy?

DARLING:Doctor Ivo. Robotnik/Doctor Eggman of course!

NINETALESUK:So!!! You're on first-name terms with Robotnik are you?

DARLING:What are you expecting ME to say then?!

CHARLIE:Darling, Darling, shh-shh. Calm down...

DARLING:Okay... okay.....


(Everything was silent till Charlie suddenly rushed over to Darling).


CHARLIE:All right you stinking piece of nothing!

DARLING:I beg you pardon........

CHARLIE:Shut your ugly cakehole, sonny! I know you! Tell me, von Darling! What was it finally won you over, eh? Was it the pay roll or was it hangin' out with devils?

DARLING:(Really scared) I'll have you court-martialled for this, Barkin!

CHARLIE:For carrying out a general's orders? That may be the way you do it in Munich! Or should I say, Munchen! But not here! Your a Devil spy, aren't you? SLOWBRO! THE HOUNDOUR IF YOU PLEASE!!!!!

DARLING:No!!!!!! No!!!!! No!!!!! I'm not!!!!!! I was born in Manchester!!!! I know all the

Pokemon of 134!!!!

NINETALESUK:250!

DARLING:250!!!!! I meant 250!!!!!!! I'm angelic as Annabelle!

CHARLIE:So! Your father is a devil, your half-devil and you married a devil?

DARLING:NO NO NO NO!!!!! I'M NOT A DEVIL SPY!!!!!!!!!!!

CHARLIE:(Calmly) Good, thanks very much. Send the next one, would you?


(Rob's face showed he was gutted! At that point, Sannabelle, Danielle and Angel came in).


SANNABELLE:Whoa! Whats happenin' here? You guys better be quiet! Don't you know this is a hospital for the sick?


(Rob was really angry).


DARLING:You'll regret this, Barkin! Fox! You'd better find the spy otherwise I'll make it hard on you two and your family!

NINETALESUK:Darling... please.. there are ladies in the room.


(Darling spat and storms out of the room, stilled tied to the chair. Angel gasped and looked out of the door).


ANGEL:Hey! Watch out for that first step!


(And, Rob's voice was crying as he fell. Angel sighed).


ANGEL:Too late!


(Danielle walked over to Sasha).


DANIELLE:Any luck?

SASHA:No... no luck at all. Hes gonna be tough to find!

DANIELLE:Oh no....


(Suddenly, the others burst in!)


ITCHY:Charlie! CHARLIE!!!

CHARLIE:Itch! Whats up?

ITCHY:We found out how is the spy!

CHARLIE:You did? Who is it?

ITCHY:Angus....

CHARLIE:Very funny(!) Come on, Itchy! Who is it?

ACE:No! Its true! Angus is writing letter to his devil friend!

CHARLIE:OH! I don't belive him!

SCAMP:Ninetales! Do ya have any idea how to explain this to Antony?

NINETALESUK:Yep. Wait after 3 weeks and I'll put my new idea into action!


*Antony's house. TIMELINE:3 weeks later....*


(Ninetalesuk, Charlie and the others were back at Antony's house. Ol'Bulldog came out of the dining room and greeted everyone).


ANTONY:Ha! Welcome back!

NINETALESUK:Thank you, Antony. Let me introduce to you, Beedrill.

BEEDRILL:How do you do.

ANTONY:Any progress?

NINETALESUK:Yep.

ANTONY:Good. Who is it?


(A couple of minutes later, Antony was laughing).


ANTONY:Angus?! HAHA!

SANNABELLE:Goodness.... hes insane as me, Ashley and Angus!

DANIELLE:Look! Whats so funny?

ANTONY:I have no idea! But, I guess Angus doesn't know hes a spy. So, we'll stop him from writing more letter. I'll give him a bell and tell explain to him why he must stop writing letters. Okay?

EEVEE:'kay.


(When Antony walked over to the phone, Smith was pushed in by Rob Darling, followed by Slowbro).


ANTONY:Darling? Whats going on here?

DARLING:I tell you what I'm doing, sir! I'm doing what Barkin and Fox should have done 3 weeks ago to find the spy!

ANTONY:Whats that?

DARLING:THIS is the guilty dog!

ANTONY:Darling, you going mad!

DARLING:I'm not! I'm not! Listen!!! Are you a spy?

SMITH:Jawohl, I em a spy.

DARLING:You see! You see!

ANTONY:Of course hes a spy, Darling!! An Angel spy! This is Captain Edward Smith-the finest spy in the Angel spy unit.


(Darling was stunned while the others were interested).


DARLING:He can't be! Not one angel speaks German while the devils does speak a bit of a german accent! He can't be!!

SMITH:Well, I hef been under cover in Belladonna's lair that I've picked up a teensy weensy bit on an accent.

ANTONY:This, Darling, everyone, was the dog who told us there was a Devil spy in the hospital in the FIRST place!


(All Darling can do was.... faint.... Ninetalesuk smiled).


NINETALESUK:Well... at least it has a funny ending....


THE END. (Bad ended.... I don't care!)

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